Patience and Selfishness

I am writing because today I learned something. I could recount all the highs and lows and reasons for my troubles that brought me to this learning moment, but that doesn't really matter right now. I guess I just want to remember these wise words that spoke to me. They are on Patience.

Patience—the ability to put our desires on hold for a time—is a precious and rare virtue. We want what we want, and we want it now. Therefore, the very idea of patience may seem unpleasant and, at times, bitter.

Nevertheless, without patience, we cannot please God; we cannot become perfect. Indeed, patience is a purifying process that refines understanding, deepens happiness, focuses action, and offers hope for peace.

From that experience, I learned that patience was far more than simply waiting for something to happen—patience required actively working toward worthwhile goals and not getting discouraged when results didn’t appear instantly or without effort.

There is an important concept here: patience is not passive resignation, nor is it failing to act because of our fears. Patience means active waiting and enduring. It means staying with something and doing all that we can—working, hoping, and exercising faith; bearing hardship with fortitude, even when the desires of our hearts are delayed. Patience is not simply enduring; it is enduring well!

Impatience, on the other hand, is a symptom of selfishness. It is a trait of the self-absorbed. It arises from the all-too-prevalent condition called “center of the universe” syndrome, which leads people to believe that the world revolves around them and that all others are just supporting cast in the grand theater of mortality in which only they have the starring role. 

Patience means accepting that which cannot be changed and facing it with courage, grace, and faith.

In your patience you win mastery of your souls.

These words spoken by President Uchtdorf really struck me as I read them. I have been really inpatient with myself lately. I have been selfish; focusing on everything I want and don't have. I have even had unrealistic expectations of someone else making me happy or another situation bringing me fulfillment. It's a foolish way to think and clearly explains why I was becoming so apathetic towards the world. Nothing was able to give me the happiness I was seeking. 


I didn't realize that the reason for these feelings was because of my impatience. I really want to stop being affected by my current situation. I want to move forward, but rather than being patient with myself and where I am at, I have been consumed with simply distracting myself. Filling my time with meaningless activities and planning future events thinking it'll all be better when...


I like the promises President Uchtdorf suggests that come from patience: refining understanding, deepening happiness, winning mastery of your souls (which was actually Uchtdorf paraphrasing Christ).


I need to stop waiting and start being actively patient. I need to stop thinking I'll just get over this and move on. I need to work and hope and endure. I need to get rid of fear and discouragement. 


I believe if I can improve my ability to be patient, I will eventually get to where I want and unreasonably expect myself to be. I need to read these words often to remember that it is patience that can give me hope in the future and fulfillment in the present. I wish wisdom and patience spoken of here would just be allotted to me - a consolation prize for trying, but I guess I'll have to go through this learning experiences just like everyone else!